Friday, June 15, 2012

Running Behind

As usual.... I have been pretty lax in my blogging lately, and that is because I have been completely exhausted from baseball games every stinkin' night of the week and practices twice on Saturday.  SO, have made a statement to my husband that come Monday I will be eating nothing that I am not supposed to.  Have been eating at the ball field alot... snacks and stuff.  Will either have to eat at home/work before the games, take a small (healthy) snack with me, and/or eat when I get home at 9:00 pm.  Gonna suck, and take some more energy, but hopefully eating better and getting (slowly) back to the gym... all will be well.

So, hope to see you more next week, and every week after!

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Another Day Closer...

I had the day off from work yesterday to get some things accomplished.  Met with a friend in the morning for a hopefully lucrative new venture, then hung out with my hubby, and then the dentist.  Always love getting good news (:P), ie. root canal, deep cleaning, and a crown needed. Yippee for me!

We got up early this morning (5:00 a.m.) and went to the gym.  That gives us time to get there and back, and to work out for about 45 minutes to an hour.  Might have to start getting up earlier once I get back into this, there were times when I needed an hour and a half to get all my stuff done.  So we shall see how the morning routine sticks it out.  I did walk a bit faster today.  Tuesday was at 2.0 mph and a 2.0 incline, today was at 2.5 mph and a 1.5 incline starting out, then went up to 2.7 mph.  I will get back to where I was, just have to take it one step at a time...  I definitely still need to work on my food choices.  The shakes are working well for me, I am not hungry on them, they fill me up, and taste great, of course.  It's the time in between the end of work at dinner time that is an obstacle for me.  Especially when I am at the ball field almost every night.  I get a little hungry, and of course don't have any healthy snacks with me, so I get some nachos, or a pretzel, or a candy bar... and then I eat dinner when we get home.

Having some issues with my scale.  Not sure it is because of the uneven boards in my bathroom or because it is ready for a new battery, but this morning I weighed first at 286.4 and was so disgusted.  Then my husband asked what was wrong, so I told him that I had gained weight.  He then told me he weighed the other day 3 times in a 5 minute period, and each time was different.  So I wiped off the bottom of the scale, put it on a flatter spot on the floor and re-weighed, and weighed in at 285.2 pounds.  Which is 0.4 pounds down from Tuesday.  My hands were really swollen again this morning (was hardly able to move my rings), so really need to start watching my salt I guess.

Time is short today, so that will be all.  Baseball again tonight.  Hopefully once that is all done, I will be able to get myself a bit more organized so this can go a bit smoother and quicker.  Just never seems to get done with all the other stuff going on...

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

A New Start

So, I feel like I am starting the whole journey over again as of today.  My husband and I got up early and went to the gym.  I walked (slowly) for 45 minutes straight.  I was a little frustrated at walking so slow, but felt if I went faster I wouldn't have been able to make it as long.  Plus, for the last 3 days my calf muscles have been crying out because of all the stairs/walking I did on Saturday.  They are still sore today!  I was feeling I was going as fast as I could, but was pissed at myself for not going faster because I started out at faster than that at the beginning of the year!

I have gained back alot of the weight I had lost.  I am only down a total of 11 pounds since my start at the first of the year.  But I am starting over.  I am determined to do what works for me.  Weighing every day works for me.  The ViSalus shakes work for me.  Working out works for me.  Counting the days does not work for me.  So, as of today, I will not be posting how many days I have been going (and let's face, I lost count a month or so ago!).  I will however, be posting my weight.  Today's weight was 285.6 pounds.  I have dealt with the fact that I may not reach my initial goal of losing 125 pounds by the end of the year.  But there are lots of people out there that lose 100 pounds in 6 months, and do it healthy.  So, I have no excuses not to reach my goal.  I am still gung ho on reaching that, but I am resigned to the fact that it just may not happen.  So whatever weight I reach, I will reach it healthy.  I will eventually reach the 125 pounds lost mark, but it may not be this year.  Small goals will be set, and I will reach them as I can.  I will be smart about what I eat, how I fuel my body, and the rest will come!

Someone asked me the other day what I was waiting for.  That I can make the choices or make the excuses.  And I know I have had so many lately.  I own up to the fact that I "cannot" find the way to make it to the gym.  Also, I think a part of me is kinda scared.  I have never been fit, or skinny or whatever you want to call it.  My husband always asks me when I lose all this weight, if I will still be with him or go find some hot young stud?!  I think I have that same fear... when I lose all this weight (and he has never seen me fit...) is he still gonna want me?  I know that is kinda a really irrational fear, cuz who wouldn't want a hot wife, right?