Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Day 87-278.6 pounds

Down just a bit from yesterday, always good to see the downward motion on the scale.  I am currently working on recipes, and have a pretty good sized list right now, but can always use more, so if you have something that is low fat/calorie and that my KIDS would eat, please feel free to send them my way.  My hope is that I will try these recipes, and post them on here, so you can see them, have the recipe and know if they are worth attempting!  

I still have not completed anything on my vision board.  Which is ok, but not ok.  I am a very visual person.  I can read something in a book or on tv and retain it well, you read something to me, or I just hear it somewhere, I have a hard time repeating it, let alone retaining it.  The point is, that I want something that I am going to look at EVERY morning as I am going through my daily routine.  It's ok that I don't have it done, it's just something I will have to work on.  It's not ok that I don't have it done, because I WANT IT DONE!  LOL

I think I am going to have to postpone the 90 day photos, as I haven't really gotten as far as I had hoped.  So maybe I will shoot for 120 days, add another month in there, and see what happens.  My husband and I had a pretty in-depth talk last night.  I told him that we have been making those bad choices on the weekends, and all that does is make me have to start over every freakin' Monday!  I am little tired of that.  So, hopefully he will help me with my menu planning, and keeping on track (cuz some of that is his fault, too!)  We go to the store, and he says, how about some Oreos....OK.  We just need to keep on track over the weekends too, not just weekdays.  Because the weekdays are not the problem, I don't overeat or eat the wrong things during the week, as I am limited to what I have bought and bring to work with me.  

I have come to the understanding that my desire to make this change has not been greater than my desire to stay the same I am.  I have finally reached that point where I am more than disgusted.  I have the desire to be there for my kids, I want to be able to go hiking with them or be able to ride amusement park rides (when and if we ever get to go on vacation!), which I think I am too big to do right now.  The change will come, I will make it come!

I am going to try to change it up a bit at the gym.  I don't think I am pushing myself like I was when I started.  I am not walking as fast as I used to, and that's not because I don't want to, but because I feel I can't.  It seems as if I have gotten in worse shape, and that has a lot to do with going to gym every day for two months, and then not going for 2 1/2 weeks.  It just doesn't work, your body goes into like a hibernation or something, and says, OK time to slow down....ummm no, go faster please!

Going back to something my friend Ashley told me... you have to make small steps.  Don't worry about your workout tomorrow, don't worry about what you are going to eat tomorrow, don't worry about whether you will lose weight tomorrow.  Because when you are worrying about all the things that COULD happen TOMORROW, you are NOT concentrating on what is happening TODAY.  And that takes the strength out of you.


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